Attention ladies and gentlemen I’m forewarning that you ready yourselves to take lift off and fly to get your very own copy of Alice Clayton’s, Wallbanger! Alice Clayton managed to have me in stitches and cackling like a mad woman, with Wallbanger before I was even half way through the first chapter!
Now I usually go into quite a bit of detail with my reviews but this one I’m going to be a little more vague and you will thank me for it-TRUST ME!
Wallbanger, which I just HAVE to say is one of my all time favourite romance comedy novels to date, starts out with a bang…..literally or more so, “bang, bang, bang”! Hold onto your lady and man panties, the Wallbanger review ride has officially started!
Wallbanger Hiding In The Shadows
Caroline our main character along with her, kick ass/almost a person, cat, Clive, has just moved into a new apartment in San Francisco and couldn’t be more excited to be living is such charming and beautiful apartment. Really. It’s PERFECT…..or so she thinks…..DUN DUN DUN!
Sneak Peek At Wallbanger
Her first night Caroline gets a rude awakening and unofficial meet with her neighbour, Simon a.k.a. Wallbanger. Wallbanger/Simon and his lady friend are having a “wrestling match” to beat all wrestling matches on the other side of Caroline’s wall and making such events very known hence the “bang, bang, bang”. Caroline looks over to see if the culprit of all the bed shaking and racket is her handsome Clive (you in time will see the grandness of all that is Clive) and poor Clive is just as confused as she is and sporting a ‘ready to attack’ tail, with said bed rocking and musical happening at the ungodly hour.
Now, this would be annoying (and possibly somewhat humerous if in the right mood) on the best of nights but this annoyance is exacerbated by the fact that Caroline’s “O”, a.k.a. orgasm, has taken a very lengthy hiatus and has shown no signs of returning from her vacation. So needless to say, there was a whole different kind of tension on Caroline’s side of the wall vs all of the happy tension bang’in around in Wallbanger’s! With no shortage of spanking (yes, you did read that right), praises to God, “Home” is finally brought forth and all is quiet for the night minus the pounding in Caroline’s head (no pun intended) from a fight with a picture frame.
Wallbanger The Cats Meow?
After a day spent with her besties, Mimi and Sophia, (whom I just have to say, are bloody hilarious on just about every level you can think of) unpacking, her and Sir Clive decide to spend some one on one time catching up on some Barefoot Contessa (best show ever! Just saying) when long and behold there is a rustle and voices in the hallway!! Caroline makes to the door peephole like the gymnast she is not and is sorely disappointed when she misses catching an eyeful of Wallbanger but is somewhat mollified with the juicy nugget that the newest Wallbanger bed mate is NOT last nights tryst! Interesting you say? Why yes, yes it is. Manwhore? Possibly….
Caroline and Sir Clive retire for the night and nod off into a blissful sleep.
Yup, you guessed it, Caroline and Sir Clive are having another “meet and greet” with Wallbanger (err Simon) EXCEPT, the newest receiving star has a bit of a…..fetish shall we say and this fetish is NOT conducive for our poor Clive….or maybe it is….(I’m having the starts of a evil grin here…). And that is where I leave you, my lovely little ducklings, on this little bit….
Audience For Wallbanger!
After a night on the town a very inebriated Caroline is brought home by her besties. In the midst of Mimi and Sophia tucking Caroline into bed, Wallbanger makes ANOTHER debut (I say debut for a reason) and knocks (almost literally) it outta the park for all three lovely ladies….along with his NEW, EXTREMELY HAPPY bed mate! Hmmmm, three different ladies?….and the plot thickens!
Caroline does manage to get a (well deserved) reprieve for a number of nights and basks in the bliss of a full nights sleep…..until she doesn’t…..
Running on fumes, thanks to “Wallbanger Wondercock”, Caroline is feeling just a tad prickly. After a total crap day at work along with a run in with the reason her beloved “O” took a hiatus, not even her Barefoot Contessa (Ina and Jeffrey even made the shit list-BOLD statement ladies and gents!) could salvage her mood, throw in realizing that all she has to wear for jammies is a piece of pink lingerie to sleep in. Icing on the cake? Not quite yet my little possums.
Wallbanger Has Been Banged!!
Aaaaaannnd, que Caroline’s wrath! Her elusive “O” is being mocked by not only her imaginary male casting stars that are strictly for her and her “Fun Time” (we all know what kind of time I’m referring to here people, no need to blush;) but Wallbanger has completely ran them off along with the itsy bit of patience that Caroline had. Simon is about to receive his proverbial cake and Caroline is about to deliver it in a fashion all her own.
She rocks it out in her baby pink nightie and damn near breaks down Simon’s door with her tiny fists of fury. Her very OWN brand of ‘BANGING’ but with very different outcomes. “Home” will NOT be brought forth tonight folks! Even if you are a smoking, too hot to touch, Simon doing his best impression of a pop up tent with a sheet.
Wallbanger has just come face to face and been ‘banged’ by Caroline!
Disappointing Ending Of Wallbanger? I Think NOT!!!!!
And Alice Clayton says, that’s all folks! No, no, no, I’m just kidding. As the book goes on we get to be privy to Caroline and Simon a.k.a Wallbanger’s second face to face, explosive meeting (which is probably the funniest thing I have ever seen/read) and begin to know him as Simon. We get to see Caroline and Simon go from enemies, to frenemies, to friends, to something that is so much more. Alice Clayton begins their journey with a budding friendship that is riddled with sexual tension and that tension just builds. Wallbanger by Alice Clayton couldn’t have been hit any harder (Ha! no pun intended, I just came up with that unintentional ditty, lol) outta the park!
My Final Thoughts
I can say without a shadow of a doubt that if you are looking for a light hearted, out of this world HILARIOUS, with just the right amount of sweet and sexy smexy, than Alice Clayton’s, Wallbanger is for YOU. If you’re looking for insta-love then best keep Wallbanger on the shelf for when you are in the mood for some sexual tension that has a slow burn that becomes an inferno then a full blown fire.
I’m a huge fan of one liners and nick names-which is damn near impossible to not make corny-and Alice Clayton, successfully, provides us with some of the best. I loved the banter between Caroline and Simon and the respect that they both have for one and other-especially when the respect was on rickety ground to begin with. The push and pull between all the characters in Wallbanger was out of this world-even Clive.
Wallbanger gave us just the right amount of just right about of sass, smutt, humour and that “awww” feeling, all rolled into one. It all just worked and, honestly, there just aren’t many books out there that can deliver an over the top funny, steamy, slow burning read WITH well rounded characters-that even includes our beloved Clive. Alice Clayton delivered all those and so much more with Wallbanger! Wallbanger will be banging on my walls over and over!! Well played Alice Clayton, well played.
“Clive was the manwhore around here”
“Sweet Lord, there were out-of-control pussies on both sides of this wall tonight”
“I padded through my new territory, taking notice of any loose Q-Tips. They would need to be dealt with if unruly.”
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts and feelings on this deliciously hilarious, sweet comedy so please feel free to leave your favourite “awww” or cackling out loud moments in the comment section below or drop me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org 🙂
Wanting another romantic comedy? Take a gander at Kennedy Fox’s, Checkmate: This Is War!
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